From Cosmo . .

Ten lame excuses you should never fall for from a guy:

• Dinner at your mom and dads? Ok. But what will I tell the orphans? They’ll still be expecting story hour
• I swear that wasn’t a fart. It’s just the way this damn leather chair sounds whenever I sit down
• I was looking at her because I was thinking how much prettier you are
• It was terrible! The aliens, they . . they said they wanted to observ human males at leisure and made me stay out until 4am . . drinking with the guys!
• I’d love to help out, but I can’t. I once killed a man in a laundry accident
• But don’t you se? My underpants and sweaty socks are protecting the floor from scratches!
• About tonight . . I was going to take you someplace nice, but I thought you’d dig the low-key vibe of Dunkin’ Donuts
• We can’t go on together . . . with suspicious minds
• I know this sounds crazy, but I’m allergic to your third cousin, I guess I have to skip her co-ed wedding shower
• Oh that was just my ex calling to say how glad she is that I’ve found someone who makes me so happy

Got more? 😉