Hey, my space has changed!


Only 2 weeks and 3 days until I’m with him again – yay 🙂 I fly out to LA Saturday, Jan. 31st and then he and I fly out to Reno on the 2nd of February. We’re spending the week in Lake Tahoe and Reno – – doing some skiing, gambling . . and whatever else comes to our minds. *eyebrow wiggle* I fly back home on February 9th in the evening. I really don’t like flying much. It’s not really a 9-11 thing, because I didn’t like flying before all that happened. . . now I just don’t really like it at all. Oh the things I will endure for him . . . .

There has been much talk recently about shacking up – which would involve his moving here. I think that him and I both are more than ready to be living together. He has said more than once that if we were local to each other, we would have been living together long before now. But this involves him moving here, from California to Wisconsin.

I know what you’re thinking – – California to Wisconsin….it must be love!

I don’t think that either one of us thought, in the beginning, that this is where it would lead to. Who knew? Mr. Charming, charismatic world traveler falling in love with Miss small town America and coming to live here – – – in the middle of Wisconsin…the cold…the cows….the unenlightened. lol I am more than happy about it – and he knows it, and yet . . . he keeps throwing it out there, almost as if to shock me with it – – just feeling me out still, maybe? I think he should know by now that it’s what I want – more than anything. I mean, I ‘m not completely miserable with the way our relationship is at the moment – – actually, not miserable at all – – just missing him quite a lot in the in between times. I know that it’s not optimal – but I would stay with him no matter if he lived here or in Zimbabwe.


Maybe not Zimbabwe. lol

Thing is – I didn’t ever think that I would be going down this road again, and yet here I am. But this time . . . well, it’s just different. With him I feel settled and balanced. And if you knew me – you’d know that settled and balanced is a pretty tall order for me – – it takes a lot to get me there. I look at him and I see so many things . . . my mentor…my protector….my love,…my best friend. I know that he secretly worries that one of these days I’m going to freak about the whole co-habitation concept. I mean – don’t let my submissive nature fool you – – outside of my relationship with him, I am fiercely independent – -I need my space . . I get very uncomfortable when people invade my space….I have things that I do in my own time without too much involvement from others – – more often than not, I cherish and prefer my downtime where I can relax, put my feet up, drink my coffee, read a book, watch some news, chat on the phone with a friend – – do whatever … but just appreciating my space.

However, things do change. Over the past two years, my space somehow expanded – and I look at him and I prefer my space with him in it. I don’t view it as giving up anything – – I see it as gaining a whole lot of things.

C., I love you . . . and you can throw at me whatever you want to – testing me to see if I’ll suddenly freak out at the concept. Keep looking up houses in the area – – keep assigning me to find out how much business Cable/DSL is in the local area – – keep making comments about how you’re going to get you, your two cats, your two cars and all your stuff here in one piece….if you don’t already know – you shall soon discover, that I’m not the freaky commitment phobic girl you met two years ago. I’m not all skirmish over the idea – my home is yours.

I don’t care how you get here – – just get here when you can.

PS. just call first so I can get the dishes done, k?

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